Now that I'm older, here's what I've discovered:
I started out with nothing, I still have most of it.
My wild oats have turned to prunes and All Bran.
I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.
Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...
All reports are in. Life is now officially unfair.
It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant.
I wish the buck stopped here. I sure could use a few .
It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.